Blog baby, blog!

This is Awesome!!!!

2010-12-19T10:03:00.000-05:00

Funniest thing my kid said today...

2010-12-11T22:09:00.000-05:00

Me "Payslee, what do you want Santa Claus to bring to you for Christmas?"

Payslee "Uh, rocks."

Funniest thing my kid said today...

2010-11-01T09:26:00.002-04:00

Trick-or-treating my Mom's neighborhood. We go to Karen's door and she says to August, "Oh you are a princess! What princess are you? Are you...Cinderella?"

August "No, I'm August."

She is a princess :)

Funniest thing my kid said today...

2010-10-29T10:51:00.000-04:00

August and Payslee have been playing "driving the car" upstairs. They come into the living room where I am seated with the computer. This is only a moment ago! Payslee enters sans shirt.

Me, "Where's your shirt?!"

Payslee, "I'm Driving!"

August to Payslee ,"You weren't suppose to drive without me!"

Me to Payslee, "Who drives without a shirt?"

August to me, "My Mama does."

OMG! It's not true, I swear! :)

Funniest thing my kid said today...

2010-10-28T09:00:00.000-04:00

Payson had a bit of a rough day Saturday. We were getting ready to go visit Mark's grandmother about one and a half hours from home. A super grumpy mood came over Payson after being wrestled on the couch and almost resulted in water going up his nose because he wouldn't get up and go put his shoes on and brush his teeth. We finally got him into the truck and we were on our way. I tickled him for 45 minutes before giving up on him telling me why he was so grumpy, my only clue being that when I told him what we were doing he said to me "So on my day with you we have to do Mark's errands?"

So we arrive at his grandmother's home, sitting and chatting with her, she is making small talk with Payson, he is slowly coming around. We are leaving and he is in a fine mood! He looks at me as we are getting into the truck and says, "You know, it funny how when you're in a grumpy mood, cute happy old people can just make you so happy."

My boy is the awesomest, true story.....

Funniest thing my kid said today...

2010-10-25T13:49:00.000-04:00

Making dinner with Bella and she says "I can't wait to have my babies."

Me ~ "Why is that?"

Bella ~ "So I can have people of my own. Then I can be the boss all the time."

Makes sense..... :)

Funniest thing my kid said today...

2010-10-11T11:09:00.000-04:00

Payson went partridge hunting with my father in the Northern woods of Maine this weekend...

Early in the morning they are driving through the woods to a place where they would sit and wait and Payson says "Daboo, (grandfatherly term of endearment) what is the point of getting all dressed up in camouflage if we are just going to be riding around in a big red truck?"

Good Question! :)

Funniest thing my kid said today...

2010-10-04T11:30:00.000-04:00

Last night...

Mark "Payslee, do you want to lay down and read a book with us?"

Payslee "Shhhh, my babies are sleeping."

Mark "How many babies do you have?"

Payslee "Too many."

Funniest thing my kid said today...

2010-08-16T16:49:00.000-04:00

"Tickly tickle tickle."-Payslee as I am trying to lay her down for a nap and she is "tickling" my eyebrows! OMG died laughing!

Funniest thing my kid said today...

2010-08-13T15:59:00.000-04:00

Playing with Payslee this morning I said "I'm going to eat you."

"NO!" Payslee says.

"Yes!" I said.

Payslee screams while I nibble her belly button, sits up suddenly and says "You can eat August."

Laughed so hard! :)

Ahhhh, A day off :)

2010-08-06T09:24:00.000-04:00

Good morning :) I have today off! Yay! I have plenty to keep me busy though, many errands and laundry :/

Tonight with the Manwich, a movie and a yummy bottle of wine. It's a raspberry wine I've never had before from a winery in Casco, ME...I'll let you know how it is, not that I am any kind of wine connoisseur.

So I got a new job, I think I posted about already. I really like it a lot better. So my point, last week I got fired from the other job, Don't be sad for me, I am not upset about it. There is suck a thing as anal retentive and if you can picture it the owner is that x10! So if I forgot to turn off the dishwasher one time I'm sorry, but I don't feel that it's so trivial that I should worry about my job security...So I will have my days free Tuesdays and Wednesdays until something better comes along :)

Only the cutest flippin baby in the whole world!

2010-08-02T16:38:00.002-04:00

Something my kids said today, not funny, sweet and cute :)

2010-07-24T11:43:00.002-04:00

Payslee is playing with her dolly and says "Momma, my baby is dead!"

"What happened?!" I exclaimed

"She broke her heart." said August...

Yesterday...

2010-07-20T09:49:00.000-04:00

All my troubles seemed so far away....Just kidding...Yesterday was a pretty good day off. August had a swimming lesson in the morning, came home for lunch and put away laundry. She has been a screamer for a little while now and has been having some rougher days lately. But yesterday was calm :) mostly....Payslee had a swimming lesson in the evening after dinner, then we all (Payson, Bella, August, Payslee, Mark and myself) took a dip together. Mark is amazing as usual...

I have a pretty good bruise on my shoulder from learning barrell rolls Sunday morning at practice. I have a doctors appointment this morning for a pain that is in my sternum for a good two months now. Mostly in the morning, this is the 3rd appointment I will have had, I hope he can figure it out...

Otherwise I am working a double, today and tomorrow, Payson starts a 3 day Apple Camp thingy tomorrow. I hope he enjoys it, I am pretty sure he will.

So I wanted to update, now I have to go :/ ttfn...

Roller derby, work and babies oh my!

2010-07-18T13:54:00.000-04:00

Quick update here...I had practice this morning, and worked last night. I started a new job a couple of weeks ago, same position, different bar. Better hours, more money, not as busy....What could go wrong? Haha....Had a yard sale for the derby team yesterday to which my manwich came to. When I got in my car to leave there were flowers in my cup holder :) I love him!!! He is gona to a Sox game today with Payson and a friend of his. What a nice day. I am going to go look at and possibly purchase a 1974 VW Super Beetle this week, so excited. And just two more weeks of swimming lessons for the kids, they are all doing awesome!!!

2010-06-11T13:35:00.002-04:00

From my phone, yea I'm pretty awesome ;)

So I think I figured out...

2010-06-11T13:32:00.000-04:00

How to send pics to my blog from my phone!!! We will see later if it works or not. This will be way more fun when I get an iPhone, which T-Mobile is suppose to be getting in late 2010 or early 2011. I am pretty effing excited! Especially after watching a video for the new iPhone 4 yesterday!!!

2010-06-11T13:24:00.001-04:00

Trying to figure out how to send this to my blog!!!!

What not to do when you close a bar...

2010-06-08T09:45:00.002-04:00

So The other night at work I decided to be awesome and lock my car keys in the bar! Don't do that...

I love my life :)

2010-05-31T12:19:00.011-04:00

So I had a birthday Wednesday, the big 30...not that big haha. I had the day off from work and Mark took the day off and the kids were with the ass master. Mark's birthday was Thursday, 40, so we had a ginormous birthday celebration Wednesday and a little more on Thursday. We had a blast. Slept in a little bit and got dressed and went to Becky's for breakfast. I made him drive us around in his "old" car, a 1978 Trans Am. Mark painted my nails for me while we waited for food :) He really is the best boyfriend ever!!!! Then we headed to pick up some supplies for his birthday surprise, a 2 hour cruise of Casco Bay in a windjammer sailboat named Windemeen. They let us take turns steering the ship and Mark got to help hoist the sails. Otherwise we sat back, enjoyed cocktails, sun and scenery on a beatiful day. I pretended for a little while that I was a pirate Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...

PS My manwich is a super dork....all part if his charm though ;)

After our sailboat ride we went back to his place to get ready. It was a fancy surprise, I bought a new dress, with flowers on it (ick) I'm not that feminine yet people. Having four brothers will do that to a girl! We went to dinner at a fancy schmancy restaurant, Grace intown Portland. It was really nice! Ambiance was perfect and the food was delicious. This place is a church that has been remodeled into a restaurant. However they kept the church feel and added a modern restaurant feel.

Then on to Bentleys where Alison of The Lower Village People had a cake for me, she is the sweetest, that was so thoughtful of her!! It was open mike night at the bar and one of the regulars made up a song for us! They are all recorded so hopefully I will have a copy to add at a later date.

So in all I took over 200 pictures Wednesday and Thursday, I could bore you with the rest of them haha, but I won't...It was awesome and a birthday I will remember very well for a really long time, thank you Mark :)

Me miss you long time!

2010-05-17T08:29:00.005-04:00

Hey people...thought I should add some interesting stuff about my life like I have never done it before. However I am going to need to be discreet because certain people WILL take certain things out of context and use them to their own advantages...

So work is ok....not thrilled about it really, not having my scheduling needs met is frustrating. The kids are really good. They are taking swimming lessons at the Y. Payson was less than thrilled about it at first but is now really enjoying himself. They are 8 week sessions, August and Bella go by themselves and Payslee and I have a parent child class which Mark has agreed to participate in if I am scheduled to work. He loves my babies :) It is really so touching and moving how much he really enjoys the children and how much he enjoys their enjoyment. He is eager to participate with them in their activities, such as watching them at swimming lessons even though it means he doesn't get to sleep in at all on Saturday mornings.

Roller Derby!!!!!!!!!!! OMG I love it :) The bowlathon was pretty much a huge success and I raised the most funds and won a bag to keep my skates in with the team logo on it! Yay me! Practices are so fun, got all my gear and everything. So we are practicing and I guess this is how it works...We need to apprentice for a couple months till we all have our skills and then apply to the WFTA (women's flat track association) then we will be able to compete! I am thinking by Septemberish?

This weekend is Mark's 40th birthday party, I will be the bartender, super fun lol. He is having the Lower Village People in his garage! He is so excited! Then next week is our birthdays, I don't even know when the last time I was excited about my birthday, maybe 21? IDK, but we both have both days off. Wednesday with no kids, so I have secret birthday plans for us :) So excited, I will have plenty of photos to upload!

Life is pretty great for the most part. Everyone is healthy and happy...I need to update more often!

Blabedy bla bla bla...

2010-04-06T09:01:00.004-04:00

Just updating, I haven't done this in a while...Working a double today at the Townhouse. Yippy skippy... I have tomorrow off, not sure why...scheduling error ;) Pretty busy lately with work and kids and Mark. Roller derby! I attended the first official meeting last Thursday. Can't wait for this Thursday's meeting. I ordered some practice skates that will hopefully come this week, then I will live on my skates as much as possible! This is a new team separate from the Maine Roller Derby. Look us up on Facebook, the Pushy Cats. My skate name? Pinky Tusca-Dare-U haha...Totally inspired by one of my customers at the bar who calls me Pinky Tucsadero, you all know who that is right? So effing excited about that! Mark is awesome as usual....We went to the adult skate at Happy Wheels last Tuesday, that was fun and there are such good skaters there! We are doing a fundraiser on April 24th, a bowl-a-thon to benefit the team and help us to pay for gear, speed skates, and probably rent for a home to have bouts out of.

The kids and I are going to have another go at a garden this year. Last year it was sunflowers and daisy's, the daisy's never came up :( This year we are going to have cucumbers, tomatoes, spinach, pumpkins, zucchini and watermelon, hopefully ;) I figured out when the last frost is online and marked the calendar when we should start the seeds for which plants. We started tomatoes and cucumbers. Hopefully this time around no one will run the plants over with their power wheels....Grrrr....We started them in little biodegradable pots that we will plant right into the ground when we transplant to outside. They have just started sprouting, two more weeks and we will start the watermeleon, spinach and pumpkins. I heard that if youi carve something into a pumpkin seed it will become a scar on the pumpkin, I think we may try that.

So my bars have Facebook pages too, you should look them up, Townhouse Pub in Saco and Adams St. Pub in Biddeford. I love working there I really do, however scheduling is becoming more challenging and summer is here almost. I want to work somewhere where I will make more money now that I have some experience, but I really do love my regulars and I am pretty sure they like me too ;) So maybe I will stay on one or two days a week for the summer...who knows.

Anyhow, I have to get ready for work...some rock out at the Townhouse!

Busy girl...

2010-03-08T20:32:00.005-05:00

Just got the kids to bed... It's the sigh of relief and relaxation at the end of the day. Everyone is sleeping, I just need to get to work now! About to wash the kitchen floor, fold some laundry while watching a movie and then a shower and set my hair in curlers. Yes curlers, think it will be kinda fun and the bonus is that I won't have to do my hair in the morning ;) Worked today, not a great or awful day...a double tomorrow after the kids go to their father's house :( We started Conflict Resolution classes together last week (rolls eyes). A wicked waste of time and energy in my opinion. I would rather spit in his face than sit in the same room with him. Eventually I won't be angry with him anymore but in the meantime he has waged war against me and I am suppose to sit in the same room with him for four weeks in a row and "share" personal aspects of my life? Not likely...Below is the cutest roller skater on the planet haha ;)

P.S. I am pretty sure I am joining a roller derby team!!! Pretty excited!!! I'll post details later...

Cutest thing my kid said today....

2010-02-28T17:12:00.001-05:00

After applying lipgloss to August's lips she says "My fake lips are so wiggly." Whatever that means, lol...

Funniest thing my kid said today...

2010-02-23T09:53:00.002-05:00

August to Payslee..."When I was a baby I lived in my mommy's belly and it was disgusting in there! And there was food."

Lmfao!

Yay my babies just got home!

2010-02-11T08:37:00.003-05:00

Two of my kids just came home from the ass master's house...I missed them so much! Payslee and August and I are going to make cookies this morning. Sugar cookies for Bella.s and Payson's Valentines parties tomorrow, and some for the man in my life. He really appreciates my cooking and it is so nice to know that.

I had a good couple of days of working and shopping. I worked a double on Tuesday and it was dead all night! When it's time to go work at a busier bar I am going to be sad to leave all the regulars. Maybe I will stay on one or two days a week or something. They have been really kids with all of my scheduling requests too. I have the same schedule next week so I am going to go snowboarding Wednesday during the day. Trying to find someone to go with me. Maybe my awesome hairdresser/sister in law.

I forgot to tell everyone, Payson is in the Gifted and Talented program now!!! I am so excited. We spent half the year last year testing him to see if they could bump him up a grade, but it went too far into the year to do anything about. His 1st and 2nd grade teachers in Waterboro just weren't willing to see his potential and labeled him lazy, which he is to an extent, but there are other factors obviously. He is so bright and I am glad that he will finally be working with teachers that see that for what it is.

what else am I doing today? I need to go and find lamp for the girls bedroom, the roomie's cat knocked over and broke the one that was in there...curses!!!!! I need to go make copies of the papers for the GAL and the post office to send it out. To work to get paid. The bank to pay the car note. Grocery store for the staples, milk, bread, and stuff to make my man beef stew on Sunday, his fave :) I love him :)Wish me luck with all this stuff on my list....

Bla...

2010-02-09T08:53:00.003-05:00

So I'm working a double today. Friday was a great night at work. I decided I really love my job and I think I am pretty effing good at it too. My plan was to find a better bar tending job elsewhere next summer but it is going to be so sad to leave some of the regulars. I've gotten to know them and they me and we like each other. Most of them like my pink hair and the ones who didn't have come to like it and surprised themselves lol.

Sunday Mark and I took the kids to the Bounce Zone. It's a local indoor sports arena and they have an indoor soccer field set up with a bunch of blow up bouncy things for kids. It was fun. My little Muffen was the funniest thing going up with giant ladder and coming down the slide. It was so big it made my stomach feel funny coming down it. August was scared of all of it for the most part. Payson and Bella had a blast.

They are at Daddy's house this morning through Thursday morning. So I am working and working and working till they come home...I got paperwork from the GAL this week, have it all filled out and sending it back tomorrow. This should prove very interesting. All right I have 90 minutes until I need to be at work so I am going to get out of dodge and find something to do till then!

All good things must come to an end?

2010-02-05T09:26:00.003-05:00

So my house mate is leaving me the week of the 14th. It leads me to conclude that I am a good person. I in particular don't live well with other people I think. I really enjoy my space and things being just so. That is not to say that my place is immaculate but the dishes in the right spots in the cupboard is another thing. So Liza and her two kids have been staying with me. I love her to bits but can't wait to have my space back! I am %100 that she feels the same way and I am glad I was able to help her when she was lacking people with the willingness. Meanwhile I have been working my toosh off and expecting scheduling changes to better accomodate my family needs in the near future. Yay me! I have to say I am a great bartender! Trying to figure out how to send photos to my blog from my phone....

Mark and I are going strong. I'm in love :) He is perfect in my eyes. So I hope my post title is not true for this!

Right this minute I am in the midst of 5 baskets of laundry, all clean at least, just folding and putting it away. Two little girls are watching Little Einstiens. I really have so much to so and so little time here! I just got internets turned back on, the es-ass and I had words about that...another long story. All good in the end. So tonight I work...Hopefully a lucrative Friday night at the Townhouse Pub...

Till next time!

Why?

2010-01-15T15:31:00.001-05:00

Why can't I send pictures to Blogger from my cell phone? WHY????

2010-01-12T21:17:00.001-05:00

Work is dead...bla..

Court and crazy exes...

2010-01-07T09:27:00.002-05:00

Just wanted to update that as of the 29th we finally have a court order for child support! Yay! We also have a guardian ad litem appointed so Chris can continue to fight to take my children away from me? Good luck with that...This process is slow, but is doing it's job so far. It has been a wicked crazy couple of months since I have updated about this situation. All I have to say right now is that people who lie like it's their job is a scary thing when dealing with the custody of your children...

FYI...

2010-01-07T09:21:00.003-05:00

When you get into an accident and have no insurance you have to file an sr-22 for the next 3 years. But they don't notify you by mail that you need to do this, or that they suspend your licence and then call it failure to provide proof of financial responsibility...Hmmmmmmm. All is well though. I need to have a hearing with the DMV people to remove the infraction from my licence and I paid a reinstatement fee yesterday. I am legal again! My wonderful boyfriend came and picked me up at 2 in the morning. He loves me :)

2010-01-06T02:14:00.003-05:00

as in back in September! So at least I am not arrested...But how am I going to get to work tomorrow?!

2010-01-06T02:14:00.001-05:00

Omg! This is a night from hell...thank goodness for my Mark. I ge pulled over and find out my liscence is suspended something to do with the accident I w

Just got home from work...

2009-12-21T01:15:00.003-05:00

Good morning :) I just got home from work....yippy..pretty slow there. Nothing super exciting to report except that I have a court date with uncle fucker and that means that I should start getting some child support pretty soon! Awesome...Still totally in love with someone ;) Kids are great. They aren't going to have much of a Christmas but it's not about the toys anyways, right? Peace and happiness...

2009-12-17T11:16:00.002-05:00

I'm at your house and you aren't here. The kids will be at my house when you get around to picking them up.

This is a text forwarded from my cell phone. I was hoping this would show the time stamp of 8:01am...funny cause I was here at 8:15 and he claims to have waited 20 minutes and the court order says he is suppose to drop them off at 8:30am.....stupid.

2009-12-15T16:00:00.001-05:00

I can post to my blog from my phone?! How cool is that?

Long Days and Long nights...

2009-12-15T09:21:00.004-05:00

So working has made me a pretty busy girl. Too busy to blog I guess. I'm going to try something new...Making Blogger my homepage so everytime I get online I think of you <3 Feeling overextended and overwhelmed at times trying to keep up with everything. But overall everything is great. I really like my job and I think I am really good at it. The kids are happy, I think they would like to have me home more, but gotta make the bacon you know?

Payson turned ten yesterday :( So sad, where has the time gone? I knew it would go fast, but that was too fast. He had a good little family gathering. Me and his sisters and my friend Liza and her kids, as they are staying with us for a while. My.....Mark came over. He is so awesome. He had the kids at school help him build Payson a bike for his birthday. This man is so thoughtful. He also took Payson to work with him yesterday after school to have him help to change my oil and check my fluids. So he also got a nascar toy, Treasure Island, a locking treasure chest, a pocket knife, a decrate it yourself mug and a lock for his bike. If you know my kid at all then you know what he said when I asked him yesterday morning what he wanted for his birthday dinner...see picture below, haha.

Today I am heading to the gym and to Kennebunk to the Kennebunk Toy Co. Earlier in the fall I went to this offbeat antique/consignment store in Biddeford that I love and picked up a brand new Melissa & Doug dollhouse for the girls for Christmas for $30....a steal considering it retails for $110. I opened the box at home and found a GC to the Kennebunk Toy Co. for $100!!! So I am going there this morning to verify it's validity and see if I can pick up some x-mas items.

Meanwhilst...I am so in love with this man in my life <3 I have a new fave picture of him and I...same guy I went to Laconia with in the summer months...fun fun! (and the same one that built the bike for Payson...

Has it really been this long?

2009-10-31T10:35:00.001-04:00

It has! OMG, I have a really lot to share....so much going on! Happy Halloween! Carving pumpkins with the babes today and taking them to my mom's later. She is going to take them trick or treating later cause I have to work :( She better take pictures...I will post later...pictures and updates and gripes oh my!

The cutest thing my kid said today...

2009-09-16T09:07:00.004-04:00

Bella was sitting at the computer with the babysitter the other night and she told the sitter "I can spell the F word." to which the sitter responded that it was not appropriate so Bella said "No, look...F...A...C...down...enter." This is how Bella gets on Facebook and plays Pet Society. Ha! So she was a little amused that it was not "that" F word. :)

Life's Little Detours

2009-09-16T08:25:00.005-04:00

So my lover is taking the long road, I think he's in a hurry to find what is right in front of him, which would be me, not that I have a huge ego or anything...I am so infatuated!!!!!!! I feel like I am in high school and I am ready for more than I thought I was or would be this far out of my disastrous relationship with Chris. I want to go on and on about him and me and the fact that he wants me and I want him so how could it be bad?? Well, I suppose there are ways it could be bad, but we know what it takes, or at least I do. But, I think he might frown upon me blogging about him, but it's all positive.

On another note...Chris is insistent that I let the children come and live with him, because I am a bad mom for working...Yes I have a J-O-B now!!! Yay me!! I am a bartender, something I have been thinking htat I would want to do for some time now. My friend Tiffany started there about a month ago and they happened to be looking for another new hire and it was me! Yippy!! No I don't have any bar tending experience, but they are training me and it's pretty much a hole in the wall bar so should be slow enough that I am not too overwhelmed. So today will only be my 3rd day that I am on by myself and looking forward to it. Meanwhile Chris happens to know with absolute certainty that this is soooooo the wrong job for me. Like he has ever been supportive of my wanting to work or any job that I have ever had except when it might benefit him, like me working for Continental. But then again the support there only surfaced once other accommodations had been made. He is playing super dad the last couple of weeks since his work schedule changed and he only has a 3 day work week. Super lame, too bad it's all for show as he thinks he has a shot in hell of getting primary custody of my children. He is bombarding my inbox with emails trying to convince me to just give them to him cause they are much better off...I will post screenshots.

Antidepressant Discontinuation Syndrome

2009-08-28T18:38:00.002-04:00

I guess there is a technical term for it. Hyper arousal is a side effect that sounds like it might be ok....it isn't what you think...HA! I am on like day 6 of withdrawal symptoms that should only last a week and can't wait to have a clear head again...noises make my head feel like I am watching and hearing everything from waaaaaayyyyy inside a tunnel or from the back of my head, which also makes it really hard to focus. For anyone who is wondering, I am not withdrawing abruptly on purpose. My insurance is required to submit a pre-authorization for this medication before they will pay for it. Which they have taken over a week now to do so. Meanwhile I have run out and have since decided that I was thinking I wanted to come off it anyways so decided yesterday after going to the pharmacy for the 4Th time that I will do just that. According to everything that I have read I am already more than halfway through with the withdrawal symptoms...and I think I am doing ok, aside from the crying spells which haven't been too frequent at all...So it should all be ok once I don't feel like a space cadet anymore.

Happiness...

2009-08-21T13:49:00.002-04:00

I am such a happy lady these last couple of months. It's still really hard that Chris and I aren't together, but it gets better every day and I am content with the fact that we can never be together. I am especially happy to be dealing with his drama from a distance instead of living in it. I am even happier to have met a fantastic guy that I adore spending time with. We seen to be in the same post relationship mess and I am not sure what is to come for us long-term, but right now I am in the moment and really enjoying his company, his humor, his optimism, levelheaded-ness, generosity and great bedroom performance. Haha! ;) It's been a long time I think since I have not felt guilty when kissing someone else, let alone doing other things. This would be the guy I went to Laconia with for bike week. I don't think we are even officially an item, but who knows what will happen down the road...I don't think I am in a place to have a relationship yet and I don't think he is either, but maybe in time, and if it's not in the cards at least we have had fun along the way! I am so happy! :)

What can I do but laugh at this?

2009-08-12T11:14:00.007-04:00

Click on the image so you can actually read what is there. However I will have to clarify for those of you who are not familiar. Jimmy the Greek's is bar here in OOB. It is also family restaurant that hosts family movie night one night a week, featuring a children's movie and a pizza buffet. So for me to say to Chris "I think I want to see how they set up the free manicures and maybe take Bella down one time." Doesn't sound to me like a bad idea. But I guess it all depends on your perspective, and if one doesn't agree with it, constitutes calling me a loser and yelling at me in front of my children. Too bad I didn't get a screen shot of the previous thread before he deleted it and re posted where he thought I couldn't see I guess. This is pretty gay, kinda like high school all over again? I am pretty angry right this moment and hiding in my bedroom so I am not taking it out on the kids...but now I have to go wash the floor...

***EDIT***

Here is the original with all comments...

and my response to this was...

It is a popular family restaurant and a bar, yes there are taps at both ends of the buiding, and if this were not an ok atmosphere for all ages, during certain hours I will admit, I doubt this same establishment would also host "family movie night" featuring children's movies and a pizza buffet. Thank's y'all for your one sided opinions, but maybe ... Read Moreget the facts straight before you hang me in the front yard? The whole point for me was it's free!! and she would def. enjoy it...whatever...Thanks for the clarity Lena ;) I could "contribute" a lot more, but all I can really do is laugh at this now...

The cutest thing my kid said today...

2009-08-11T15:46:00.002-04:00

For some reason when the girls pretend play they are always driving to Texas. So I don't know what the fascination is or why they are always going there, I can only speculate that it may be because I went there for airline training a couple of years ago. Or maybe because Sandy squirrel is from Texas (everybody loves Sponge Bob) So I just asked August "What's in Texas anyway?" And she says "Stuff." It's really a much shorter ride than you would think.
There you go...

Cutest Thing My Kid Said Today...

2009-07-27T21:51:00.003-04:00

Payson~"I know why you can't buy me all the toys I want."

Me~"Oh really? Why?"

Payson~"Weel for one you don't have the money, and for two cause then I would just be a spoiled brat. (big hugs from Payson) Thanks for taking such good care of me, I love you so much."

My kid is awesome!!

Me and my new lover, damn he's fine!!

2009-07-27T02:11:00.001-04:00

Create your own FACEinHOLE

Payslee broke my glasses :(

2009-07-23T11:13:00.003-04:00

The cutest thing my kid said today...

2009-07-20T18:39:00.001-04:00

August "reading" the dinosaur book to Bella-"It's a broccoli-saurus, Bella."

The cutest thing my kid said today...

2009-07-18T09:34:00.002-04:00

August 2 and a half, talking about the bug on the window~"It's dead Bella, I keeled it Mama's fleef floff. It's so dead."

Am I a little late for this reading list thing?

2009-07-14T16:00:00.003-04:00

I just finished adding books to "Payson's summer reading list" wish list on Amazon. He can read these and any others by the same authors. He is suppose to read six books a month from June to August. Once the list is completed and returned to school he gets a free ice cream and a book! Yippee! Click the Amazon button below to see what we're reading. BTW for anyone who doesn't know, he is 9 and a half going into the 4th grade!

It's been a little while...

2009-07-13T16:46:00.013-04:00

So I have been a busy little beaver. Been keeping my social calendar pretty full. although I have taken my personals ads down due to volume of responses, I am a lady in high demand, haha. I have met some really nice people, who I hope will remain my friends for a while, and have met some not so nice people.

I have been trying to get back into the gym more frequently. We had rain for like 2 weeks straight, and I kinda took a hiatus for the second week of it. Who wants to go out in the rain? So one week off and now I am back to work on my bod. My only problem seems to be that I have gained 6 pounds in the last week. I know muscle weighs more than fat, but 6 pounds?!?!?! Seems excessive...I had done a couple of Pilate's classes at the gym and really liked it, but they only do it twice a week. Once early on Friday morning ( a bitch to get there so early) and in the evening another day. So I used some of my MTurk money and bought a mat and a video and have been doing this workout at home for a couple of weeks now. It kicks my abs every time! The leg exercises really get me too, but I feel so much stronger every time and can't wait to advance in difficulty to the next video!

I think I am the happiest I have been in a long time. I am in control of my life and who I see and what I do and when and who can piss me off, lol. I am working out and I am social. I am making friends and riding the bull haha. I am back baby and people love me! :)

Here are some pics of the kids in the aftermath of all the rain...

I miss Michael Jackson!

2009-07-01T11:10:00.001-04:00

The cutest thing my kid said today...

2009-06-21T23:05:00.003-04:00

I love listening to them takl to each other, so effing cute!! So I am listening August and Bella talking and looking for their bathing suits, shich they are had to wear to bed tonight. August says, "Bella you have an apples bathing soup." and Bella responds "It's a bading suit, not a bading soup."

Payslee's New Words

2009-06-20T08:56:00.003-04:00

Payslee started Wednesday saying "what" and "uh-oh!" So cute! That brings her total word count to....5, mama, dada, that...OMG they grow too fast.

The cutest thing my kid said today...

2009-06-19T09:55:00.002-04:00

Payson to Bryce last night as they are getting ready for bed~"Dude, how did your toes get so flat?"

Laconia, NH

2009-06-19T08:43:00.008-04:00

So my friend Mark took me with him to Laconia on Tuesday for bike week celebrations. It was so awesome, there were a ton of custom paint jobs on NICE Harleys. Some really interesting cycles on more than two wheels. They close the main street off to only motorcycle traffic and there are tents and things set up all over the place with different foods and vendors selling t-shirts and other bike week memorabilia. My mom kept the kids for me, so cool of her! Dorky pic of him below, but I look cute :)

We got a little later start than expected, about 11am. It was about a 2 hour ride there and we stopped at Hawg's Pen in Farmington (a biker bar) on the way for a stretch and used the restroom. The weather was absolutely gorgeous, perfect bike weather. So when we arrived we got parked and perused some of the vendors, we went down to the lake and put our toes in the water, stopped at a watering hole and had a couple of drinks and I met two really cool chicks who work there, Mouse and Amanda. Amanda and I pictured below.

After the bar we got some fried dough then walked down to the Smokehouse because they were having a tattoo contest, existing ink. We got there a little late, I was a last minute entrant into the "most original" portion. I think I got honorable mention. The chick that one the trophy had crazy ink all over her skull and no hair. So that was pretty rockin anyways. Then we went looking for a pink helmet, came pretty close with the one I got, and am pretty happy with it, thank you Mark! :)
Below from top to bottom~me enjoying the sunshine lying next to the lake~showing my tats to the judges~rockin my cool motorcycle helmet :)

We went back to the bar where the girls work and had some potato skins, which were pretty yummy by the way, and some H2o, much needed. Then we were headed for home. Froze my arse off, but well worth it! We ended up getting back about 4 hours later than planned, thankfully my mom was not about to kick my ass over it. Thanks mom ;)

Overall awesome day, great weather, good company, new friends, good food and a lot of fun! Enjoy the pics :)

The cutest thing my kid said today...

2009-06-19T00:16:00.001-04:00

Bella-"Can I have a smoothlee?"

This is pure fruit juice mixed with pure carrot juice.

Cutest Thing My Kid Said Today...

2009-06-18T12:46:00.003-04:00

I asked August what she was doing, to which she replied...

"Hanging out."

Cutest Thing My Kid Said Today

2009-06-15T14:24:00.002-04:00

Bella-"Santa knowed I needed a new Leapster, he is a smart guy!"

Glad...

2009-06-14T00:13:00.005-04:00

To know there are some gentlemen left on the planet! It really is a relief to know that there are some men that are gentlemanly enough to not try making out with a chick on the first date. I had a GREAT day today. I went belated birthday shopping with my friend Brent. We had lunch at Lone Star. I rode the bull this evening, went to a biker bar, had a ride on a Harley (I love Harley's!), now I am at home watching Law and Order and then sleeping :) BTW , he won the shirt tonight, not me...

Pretty proud of my participation at the gym!

2009-06-07T16:09:00.002-04:00

I am so happy to be able to finally be sticking to doing something at the gym, and pretty impressed with what I am able to do! In the last week I ran two and a half miles five times. A routine with the weight machines is also part of my routine as well as a visit to the sauna (my favorite part). Friday morning I added an hour long beginner pilates class. That was a great workout, and I felt so much more stretching and soreness in my abs than from any of the other excercises I have been doing. I am going to try to incorporate that into my daily routine. So I started running at 4mph, which ended up being a little too slow. I upped it the next day to 4.5 and then to 5mph. Friday, after pilates I did 15 minutes at 5mph, 10 minutes at 5.5mph and 5 minutes at 6mph. I am pretty impressed with that. To not even be winded, sweaty as all hell, but not winded in the least. GO ME! Can't wait to get back there tomorrow!

My birthday was a blast!

2009-06-05T12:23:00.002-04:00

Nona and Aurora came over and kind of surprised me with a sitter and a night out! They dressed me up and made me stuff socks in my bra, I guess it gives a lift... Anyhow, we got dressed, arent't we cute?? ;) Went down to Jimmy the Greek's where they were suppose to be giving free manicures. However, the manicurist had just left, so we stayed a little while and had some martinis!

Nona forgot her i.d. so we were asking the barback where we coiuld go where she would not be carded. He was kind enough to give us directions to a bar not far from there. I was a little buzzed and my memory is not what is should be when I am, so I just invited him along. I think he was a little hesitant, but agreed after informing us he didn't get off work for half an hour. The bar manager gave me a birthday drink while we waited. Aurora got me a shot of some high shelf tequila that I don't remember the name of, I thought it would be utterly disgusting, but I kinda liked it and it was interesting that you are suppose to take this shot first licking salt off your hand, take the shot and then bite a lemon. It was all so much smoother than is seems like it would be. So we followed the barback to the other bar, Nona didn't get carded, lol, had a lot of good conversation with a few people. There were 2 other people celebrating their birthdays that day! I should have gotten pics with them ;) Nona almost got us in trouble for soliciting men to flirt with Aurora for money.

So I have a thing for men in uniform, and it apparently runs deaper than I thought. When we were leaving the bar the adorable barback picked me right up and carried me to the car. So before I got in the car I grabbed his face and gave him a quick, small kiss on the lips and said "Join the military and I'll kiss you better." Wow! I have no idea where that came from accept for the previously mentioned.

So we left the bar and went to Burger King. Nona went through the drive thru while Aurora and I peed in the bush. On my way back from the bush was when I saw the cop parked in the lot accross the street, and he probably saw the whole thing. He started following us as soon as we pulled out onto the road and pulled us over a couple of miles down the road. Not because Nona was drunk or weaving, but because the registration was expired. So while Nona got some sobriety tests Aurora and I ate our food, Aurora ate Nona's too! I chatted up the other police officer that was there. Showed him pics of my kids, talked about family and what we had been doing that night. He was pretty nice, until Aurora wanted to open her door and smoke a butt. He wasn't too keen on that, he was still pretty chatty with me though. Nona was let go with a warning about the registration, and then pretty pissed that Aurora ate her burger, lol. We went back to my place and crashed.

Good friends, plenty of laughs, guys worth oggling and good drinks made for a very fun and memorable birthday. Thanks ladies!!!!! :)

The cutest thing my kid said today...

2009-06-05T07:51:00.004-04:00

August-"Flease can I go outside flease?"

First person to get this right wins a dollar.

2009-06-03T22:02:00.003-04:00

Can you guess what is in the cd player in my car?

There was a tornado today!

2009-06-02T17:41:00.003-04:00

Not really, but August was just like on all over the place today. I can't keep up with the messes she makes! First was the yogurt she helped herself to while I wasn't looking, and ate it with her hands and shared with Payslee, omg. So I put her in the tub, came down to clean up Payslee and back upstairs to find an inch of water on the floor, apparently the tub was sinking and she needed to bail it out!

Bella registered for kindergarten yesterday! She is going to be the youngest in her class because her birthday is on the deadline to be 5 by.

I am going to add something to this blog. I am going to try to post everyday "The cutest thing my kid said today" Here's one to start with from my four year old. She said this the other day and I have a couple others I will post before being current...

Bella-"I was going to marry Luke, but now I am going to marry Caleb because Luke climbs on the table when Nana is here."

I need to be aggressive!

2009-05-25T16:50:00.005-04:00

So some certain person is going to make it difficult for me to get the remainder of my and my children's belongings. So what I will end up having to do is go there with a police escort on a day when I can get a sitter.

Meanwhile, I am trying REALLY hard not to obsess about the whole thing and him and yada yada yada. Tom is coming over tonight. I need to get into the shower momentarily and get ready for that, make myself all cute :) Kind of hard when I receive nasty emails like this one...because I looked at his profile on Yahoo Personals...

I took the kids to the beach today. We weren't able to stay very long at all. Bell and Payson were playing at the edge of the water and Bella fell in. I had dressed them in short because I figured they would play in the water a little bit, but didn't think anyone was going to get totally wet, so I hadn't brought any towels, so we came home. Payson was pretty upset with me.

I can see that Payson is craving some male attention. My neighbors friend Wayne comes to visit her a couple of times a week, and Payson over the last couple of days is really trying to get his attention and wanting to show him things. Too bad he hasn't see his Dad in like 2 and a half weeks. He got all pinks at school last week, so you owe him $5 Chris.

Off to the shower to get cute! :)

Sitting in the living room.

2009-05-24T22:59:00.003-04:00

So I just got done talking to Todd on the phone for like 45 minutes. He is pretty funny and laid back. We are going out on Wednesday. We are going to go to N. Windham to a new club that opened there. I am sure we will have a good time. I want to go shopping for a cute dress to wear!

Brent came over last night and we watched My Bloody Valentine in 3D. He brought some beer and take out from Jimmy the Greek's. I had a calzone and some spanikopita. The spanikopita was OK, could have used a little more feta in my opinion. He is a really nice guy and very thoughtful. I get the impression though he is looking for something much more serious than I am. So hopefully we can be friends.

Tom was suppose to come over tonight and watch a movie with me, but he got to keep his daughter a few extra hours. So he will be over tomorrow night instead.

Off to bed now, I had more on my mind, but am bombarded with messages from men on the personals site. Loving the attention! :)

Feeling mentally axhausted today...

2009-05-21T10:38:00.003-04:00

I am obsessing over certain people today who don't deserve to be in my thoughts. I just need to stop! I can't change his point of view, I can't change the way he feels about me, and I am not going to be changed. How could he say he loves me but want to change everything about me? It's kind of sick. I feel stupid for falling for all of this and ending up in this predicament.

Plan of action...distract instead of react. I am getting out and having fun and meeting people, people who like me for me, well, maybe they don't, lol, but they aren't trying to change me into something/one that I am not and never will be.

I just don't want to be sad anymore. It's always there though.

So I am seeing Tom for a movie this weekend, kind of can't wait.

I am meeting up with Brent on Saturday, we are gonna ride the bull, yee ha! He's funny, makes me laugh, that is important.

Todd is taking me out next week. He seems really nice and down to earth, easy to talk to and I think we will have fun. It seems like, and I hope I am right, that he isn't looking for anything more than I am. Someone to hang out with and have a good time.

Okay, I have put off going to the gym long enough this morning, I am on my way there now. Oh and Brent says he found me at least one dresser, he is so thoughtful! I hope I know what I am doing, I am definitely enjoying the attention however. Time to go sweat ;)

Got my hair done on Monday!

2009-05-20T09:24:00.003-04:00

Melissa is the best hairdresser ever! Hairs Gone Wild in Windham, 893-2424!

Had a dream about Anthony Bourdain last night...

2009-05-20T07:39:00.002-04:00

So I wrote him to tell him about it, lol, and here is what I said...

I had a dream about you last night. We were dating, and the emotions behind it were pretty intense for both of us. You would fly me to different places you were filming, we would drink craft beers on location after you were done shooting. I wasn’t sure how seriously you were into me until Deb (your daughter in my dream) showed up, and we were introduced, initially thought she was someone you were seeing. Deb and you and I went on a lavish vacation to France and Spain and other places, drinking awesome beer everywhere we went. I think you were still filming at all those places, but would steal glances at me when you could. Then I lost my purse in the airport in Portland, ME. Deb helped me find it and we went to try and have dinner at a restaurant that only served dishes based on pears in the form of pie. It was like $250 flat rate for dinner, but the service was terrible. Come o find out it was because the waiter was someone who was seriously into you and was crushed because you and I were an item, and planning to get married at this point. So we left, then I woke up. Kinda weird, just wanted to share, lol. There is definitely something sexy about you though.

Hi Mark! :)

2009-05-18T14:29:00.001-04:00

My brother reads my blog! :) Going to the Genius Bar in a couple of days to see if my iMac is salvageable. Cross your fingers for me!

Wash-Dry-Fold is the greatest!

2009-05-17T10:41:00.003-04:00

Yesterday I went and picked up all the laundry from Chris' house and took all the laundry from home and went to the laundromat where they have wash-dry-fold service. I am sure it is more expensive than washing it all myself, but the idea of hanging out there and folding it all when I got home was less than appealing. So I went for it, at $1 per pound, I had 76 pounds of laundry, but it was so worth it. I dropped it off at 3pm and it was all done and ready to go at 7pm. I have a washer and dryer, but they too are at the kids' dad's house.

I also had the cable and Internet turned on yesterday, yay Internet!!! No more stealing the neighbor's wireless and hoping not to get booted! :) I can Mturk and ChaCha and all kinds of stuff! Yay, I am a little excited can you tell? My dishwasher will be returned from Rent-a-Center on Monday. Money is going to be tight this month, I have to renew my car insurance and reregister my car, that's a lot for one month.

So my Muffen is napping, I am blogging. It is kinda raining out so the other kids are watching a movie, Shark Boy and Lava Girl 3D. I think I am coping pretty well with the parting of ways between Chris and myself and the fact that he is trying to get back with vagina woman. I kind of wish I had emailed those pictured to myself, because I am a little evil, but I would probably get in trouble for that one.

Meanwhile I need to get some kitchen chairs and some bureaus for the kids and myself so I have somewhere to put all this folded laundry!

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I have two beautiful rings.

2009-05-14T20:31:00.004-04:00

One is suppose to representative of a bond and everlasting love between a certain man and myself. It's gorgeous, 1920's platinum and diamonds engagement ring. Everything that it stands for was based on lies and somehow I can't stop looking at it, admiring it and thinking how beautiful it is. Remembering good things that it stands for, even though the bad certainly outweighs the good at this point. Given to me shortly after the birth of our first daughter. "The one that tried to kill me" lol

The second given to me for Mother's Day this year, my first and only Mother's Day gift from the father of my children. It should represent the spoken and unspoken appreciation of my devotion to him and to our family. It should represent his respect and love for me and for our children. It is also beautiful. The center stone is an oval rose quartz set in white gold on a high mount surrounded by black diamonds and hearts cut out of the setting. It is truly beautiful. I want to wear it all the time, but I don't know if I can bear this reminder. The reminder that it actually represents none of these things. Instead it is a reminder of that which I can never have for myself, for him and for my children. A reminder that the supposed love that he has for me comes with many, many conditions. I am reminded by this thing of beauty that I love a man that doesn't and never can love me for me. That I will never be good enough.

After what I discovered today I have to ask, does he even, did he ever even love me at all? It all comes back to this crotchety cobweb vagina bitch in Missouri. At least for the last week they have been talking to each other. I guess it is all moot in the end and I should be happy to know after ending this on my own, but I do still care, and I don't know if this could hurt any more if I hadn't moved out. I suppose this answers a lot of questions that I might not have otherwise known the answer to. Like why he has been so distant and why we have hardly said 20 words to each other over the last month. I guess it's not because I don't have the energy or want to clean everything every single night after the kids are all in bed.

I am not perfect. Far from it in fact. But I will tell you what is. My love for my children is perfect. My children are perfect. This situation is so far from perfect that I don't know how to move past knowing I will never have the one thing that I have wanted since before I met him. The one thing that brought us together in the first place. Family. I wanted a whole family, for me and for Payson, and more kids. I guess I got the more kids part and now I get to do the rest myself.

I knew moving out that it was the end of our relationship. I honestly thought I might have a while before I would have to deal with him being with another woman though and never would have thought it would be her. He is a great liar and I guess I really just wanted to believe it all. So...I am not in a goo space, this is going to take some time to process, not to mention the rest of the drama that he has created today...I will have to add that I only know about vagina woman because I was looking at his phone and reading his email. So what, I am nosy, that is nothing new, and will probably never change. The irony here is that his statement to me that was pretty much the deciding factor in my moving out was in response to my pretty much spilling mu guts to him about how I felt and how I pictured things being between us..."I can never be that for you because I don't trust you." Who shouldn't trust who?

moving again...

2009-05-12T11:44:00.003-04:00

So we are moving back into my dinky apartment. I am in a really sad state right now. How can two people to supposedly love each other not live together happily? Reasoning is beyond my reach for that one. So I am finding it really hard to be motivated right now to unpack or anything else. Meanwhile, all my dishes are still at his place and I have no money for food until Friday, so my neighbor bought me some cereal nd milk and loaned me some bowls and spoons, tonight I will spend my whopping $5 on a Little Caesar's pizza and tomorrow I will be at the food pantry, first in line hopefully. Come on Friday! I won't have any Internet or phone until Saturday, which is ok, I am "borrowing" my neighbor's wireless, and I don't really want to talk to anyone anyways!

I started Chantix last week, and I am cut down to 2-4 smokes a day, I like to think it would be more like none if I weren't so sad and stressed. I don't think I am going to be able to swing going to OR for Brewfest :(

Things I would really like to do in the next 3 months...

1.focus more and do more with my children

2.get a new tattoo :)

3.Have closure in my mind that this is the end of my wishes for a whole family for my children

4.Go to OR for Brewfest and cousin time

5.Take better care of myself and my emotions

6.Be more motivated to get my note finding/selling business off the ground and make some real money for my family, I would like to have a Prius by next fall :)

Mother's day was a two way surprise. I received my first Mother's Day gift from the father of my children. A ring with rose quartz and black diamonds. It is gorgeous, I love it. The other side was "he" just stayed in bed all day and I got to tote 4 kids around while I moved all of our beds on the roof of my van because "it's my day off, not yours."

------Edit------for clarification, I didn't have time or boxes to get any food from Chris' house, and he didn't know I didn't have any food here. This update is because he didn't like the way he was portrayed in this post. So this morning he went to the grocery store and bought us some groceries. Thank you for that, but I was not asking.

Brewfest!

2009-05-06T18:08:00.003-04:00

I am hoping and trying to plan on going to Oregon's Brewers Festival, which is from July 23rd to July 26Th. I think plane tickets are as low as they are going to get right now, hopefully I can get up enough funds to buy a ticket before they get any higher! Currently it's $300 including taxes and fees. My cousin has that week off from work and her friend Janet that I met last time I was there, she is so nice and loves beer like me, and she will be joining us. As well as another friend of hers, Sarah, who is also from Maine, we are going to try to book our travel together. I will keep you all posted on my progress earning the funds to go! Lots of Mturk for me, and hopefully I can get some AdSense money. Wish me luck!

I have mixed feelings today...

2009-05-03T10:14:00.002-04:00

So this "thing" I have with their dad is simply not working. So we are going back to my aparetment this week. It really is bitter sweet. I think from an outsiders perspective it may seem that I don't mind all of this back and forth and drama. That couldn't be farther from the truth. I just hope I am strong enough to keep him out of my bed and put my foot down in other areas. I hate that the kids are right in the middle of this. I really just felt, and still feel that a whole family is best for everyone. However as of this morning everything that I have been wondering was confirmed. Our relationship will never be what I want and need it to be. SO from now on, I will be in charge of my own finances and have spending money when I need it, and no one is going to tell me what I can or can't do and when. I will be lonely, but I am lonely here anyways. I hope the kids are ok through this.

So tired today....

2009-04-30T20:23:00.003-04:00

I am so tired right now, I could go to sleep. Two out of four of my little ones are sleeping. Payson is finishing up his book report and Bella is watching soap operas with me because with crying eyes she told me she wants to be big, so being being tired beyond reasoning I let her stay up with me. She will innevidably fall asleep and I will carry her up to bed.

My life is boring lately. Today was errands and grocery shopping and feeding kids and playing outside.

OH, here's something fun, I made a needle felted butterfly last night. My second attempt at needle felting. The first was a little frog that ended up being just a head because I couldn't quite figure out how to make the legs. So my butterfly that started out wanting to be a dragonfly turned out pretty cute and didn't take very long to make. I picked up a copy of Sweet Needle Felts by Jenn Docherty and want to make all teh cute little creatures in there in varying colors. I will add some pics to this post later. Always later with me I guess. Nighty night...

Restriction Lifted!

2009-04-28T22:10:00.003-04:00

So I am unrestricted on the internet these days, good news.

Today was soooooooo beautiful! Eighties and not too humid. I am playing the novice gardener this Spring. I planted a small garden with Lena's and my children. They were most interested in playing with the worms and planting the seeds. They were all nice enough to let me do the rest, lol. Today I turned the soil in front of the house against the wall and planted some flower seeds that I got at the dollar store, hopefully they grow! I will ad pics later if they do!!! :)

If this isn't gay, I don't know what is...

2009-04-19T17:07:00.002-04:00

So my iMac needs a motherboard, maybe I can earn enough from AdSense to get a new one. Someone has also grounded me from the Internet for blogging about masturbation. So, this is all very gay.

Otherwise, the weather has been beautiful, we have been spending a lot of time outside, and the kids have all been sick with a horrendous cold that includes eye seepage, yuck...

Yesterday...

2009-04-12T13:17:00.004-04:00

All my troubles seemed so far away, love was such an easy game to play, lalalalala. I am a great singer!! :) Yesterday was lots of fun for the kids. We went candle pin bowling in the morning at Vacationland Lanes in Saco. We went there because we thought it was free for kids on Saturdays between certain hours, but it ended up being one free child per one paying adult. Lean negotiated for free kids shoe rentals though! Then we got some munchkins from DD and I took Lena and the boys home.

Lena's mom watched the kids for her last night so we could attempt one more time to go ride the bull at Jimmy the Greek's in O.O.B. I had hoped my brother would come over and watch the kids so I could go, but he had a long day laying floor with one of my other brothers. So I was kinda sneaky and left Chris a note after the kids were all sleeping, he was too, and I was on my way. Surprisingly he wasn't mad at all when I got back. I was gone about an hour. By the way I won the sexiest bull rider competition! Got a tee, a key chain bottle opener and a Guinness medal! Yay me! Lena took photos so I will edit those in later! What a good time! I told her we should go every Saturday and see how many tee I can win!

Today is Easter, and the Easter Bunny(Chris) didn't save any money for Easter baskets, thankfully no one has asked why he didn't come this morning. My Aunt usually cooks a big dinner on Easter, but no one has heard from her, I have a very sad family life.

This morning I had a little reunion with my little sister, Jacquie. I haven't see her in something like 4 years. She has two kids, they are adorable. We have both just been so busy making and taking care of our families that we had lost touch. I guess it would have been harder to lose touch if she were my biological sister, long story behind that. In this I have learned that our little sister Mindy is in need of help in a big way. We will have to do something about that. So we had a good get together, her boys are adorable, and they all played together really well! Can't wait to do it again!

So I am at my mom's house, she is sleeping off her overnight shift at the hospital, we are here because it is halfway to my Aunt's and I thought we were going there, but she isn't answering her phone either, so we will probably head home soon and I will cook dinner, then yay bedtime! :)

HAPPY EASTER!!!

wholy mackeral, 9 kids under one roof!

2009-04-10T22:22:00.003-04:00

So what an eventful day! I went to my neighbor's this morning with 3 of my kids. We hung out for most of the day playing outside. What a beautiful day! Then I picked Payson up at school, making a total of 6 kids including her two. It's Friday, which means pizza night with Nini (Lena's mom) and Lena and the kids, and her friend Wayne was invited with his two kids and his nephew came along. WOW, 9 kids have a lot of energy! So i volunteered to watch Lena's two while she went bowling tonight to give Nini teh night off, not completely selfless...giving her the night off means tomorrow night she will watch the boys so Lena and I can go ride the bull! Yee-ha! I will have to remember my camera for that tomorrow night! So Lena left for bowling and Wayne and I were there with 9 kids. I will tell you that it is way easier to keep track of more than three just by counting rather than looking for them each and recalling names, maybe they should have all just been born with numbers, lol. So that was definitely a lesson in birth control, too bad it was four kids too late! Ha! Kind of kidding on that one. I LOVE my babies! :) They make me happy, happy, happy :) So Luke and Caleb are staying the night with me, all the rugrats are in bed now, so I am signing off, nighty night!

Have a great idea today!!!

2009-04-10T09:22:00.002-04:00

So this morning I brainstormed a great fun idea for a photo shoot. I'm not going to share too many details, it might spoil it. So I need to recruit some models and a photographer and some clothes to get loaned from somewhere. It should be great. I will keep you posted on my progress on this top secret project! When complete I will share the results as well.

Gherkin

2009-04-09T22:15:00.001-04:00

I just informed my neighbor it is a real word! It's a pickle! :) lolol

Ha! Check this out.

everything came back normal...

2009-04-09T10:53:00.002-04:00

The pediatricians office just called, all tests came back normal. The next step is trying her on over the counter Claritin (for allergies) for a couple of weeks to see if her fatigue worsens, gets better, or stays the same. Good news I guess...

I did grocery shopping with Payslee this morning, she was so talkative.

I think Chris is not talking to me today, he hasn't been very sociable the last three or four days, I am pretty sure this is because he is out of pot. Not my favorite thing about him at all. Not that I am completely opposed to using it, but when it is multiple times daily, and effects your moods to this extent when you go without it, it is a huge problem, not to mention that I hate the idea of it being in the house.

I have been awol from the gym the last couple of months, primarily because the kids have caught one cold after another pretty much all winter! So tomorrow I am headed to the gym with the kids. I started giving them a probiotic supplement in hopes that it will help them not to catch every bug they come in contact with, or at least lessen teh amount of time that they are sick from a bug. So far so good! I got a shewable for the older kids and a powder that I put in the baby's food, and have to do that for August too because she doesn't like tha taste of the chewable. I just can't let her see me put it in her food or she won't eat it!

TODAY!

2009-04-08T10:10:00.002-04:00

I am taking Bella to the doctors to have blood work done. She has over the last three months been SOOOOOOOOoooooooo tired almost all the time. She is the one who will get up out of bed twenty times after bedtime before staying in bed to fall asleep. So she has been falling right asleep pretty much as soon as her head hits the pillow between 7:30 and 8o'clock. She has also been without naps for over a year, and lately been falling asleep in the car and on the couch and taking naps. So I am a little concerned that maybe her iron is low, or maybe a thyroid thing is going on. I guess we will find out today, or in the next couple of days.

After I pick Payson up from school we are all piling in the van and heading to the grocery store to pick up coffee and dinner to take to my brother's house. He was in a pretty bad car wreck a couple of weeks ago and broke his hip and a couple of ribs, thank goodness he wasn't killed! I love my brother! So we are going to go and tidy up his bedroom, do some laundry for him and cook him dinner. Then probably back home and put the kids to bed. Am I a bad mom for loving bedtime SoooooOOOOoooooo much???

Have you ever stalked someone online?

2009-04-07T22:33:00.003-04:00

Just wondering, I don't know how much of that sort of thing would be admissible in court if I go on about it! Lololol :) I am still having issues with Chris' recent history in the last year, sometimes obsessively so. Still doing the counseling thing, and have decided that I am undecided about what is going to make it better. I thought just trying to forget that it ever happened would work, NOT AT ALL! So, now I just stalk "her" online, and snoop in his computer, and suggest inappropiate edits to her profiles on various sites...Seems so childish, and it is, I will admit it. But she wouldn't talk to me when I called her months ago, damnit. OK, so I am an online stalker, and a snoop. Guess the cats out of the bag now!!!

Had my hair done today...

2009-04-06T14:21:00.003-04:00

SOooooooo, today I got my hair done, guess what color?!?! Pink, yes, I am a pink-a-holic, and my hairdresser is THE shiznit! Melissa Zogopoulis at Hairs Gone Wild in Windham, ME. She is AWESOME! She books like an entire month in advance, so if you want to see her, call ahead, 207-893-2424! Bella got a trim also, her first hair cut, so bitter sweet! :( AND she had to have pink in her hair like mama, too cute, she is so beautiful!

Otheriwise, it was a rainy, crappy day, BLA! Watching soap operas now, before bed. Not feeling the love too much from the other half. Oh well...

After picking Payson up at school we went to my awesome neighbor's house and hung out and stayed for dinner, hot dogs and beans, baby!

I am also trying my hand at needle felting. Picked up some roving, needles and a little kit at the craft store the other day. I am going to go to the library in the next couple of days to see if they have a book I was looking at online. If not I guess I will get it on Amazon. Yippee...

Tired today, much fun last night!

2009-04-05T11:31:00.004-04:00

SO I am pretty sired today. The bar down th street has a mechanical bull on Saturday nights, so the goal was to go ride the bull in their "sexiest bull rider" competition. However, when Lean (my neighbor) and I arrived at the bar they had a function going on and weren't going to be setting up the bull.

We didn't let that stop us from having a good time though. We went to another bar where, can you beleive, they wanted a cover charge of $10?!?!?! Outrageous!

Nope, we didn't stop there. Next stop was a dive bar not so downtown, where there were a total of 4 people on a Saturday night. We listened to some music, I had a white russian and a beer (Shock Top), Lena had water, we played some pool, which I happen to suck at these days. I haven't played in years, I used to be a decent shot. We spent about an hour there, then headed back to her place to relieve her mother of her babysitting duties. Thanks to her for that by the way!

Once at Lena's house teh party was on! Wii tennis and bowling! It was fun, lots of laughs, we played until almost 1am, then I returned to Chris' house to find my baby was screaming and had been up for the past hour, and didn't realize until this morning that she was probably in pain from her 4 molors she is cutting. Bad mom! So I was up until just after 2 and up at 7, I will be taking a nap today!

4th Annual Egg-Stravaganza!

2009-04-04T13:50:00.004-04:00

This morning I got the kids all together and with my neighbor and her two little boys we went down to the local middle school where the rec department and local businesses put on an Easter event for the kids, for free! It was fun, they had some games, and different air filled bouncy type thingies.

Instead of an Easter egg hunt thy filled an area with 6000 eggs! Before entering they gave you a small paper bag and a strip of paper with dots, one for each of 5 different colored eggs you were suppose to find. Once the kids found the eggs they turned them in to a lady and got a bag full of candy!

The girls and myself got our faces painted, Payson wasn't into that. There were cookies and cupcakes and more candy for prizes, and teh Easter Bunny was there available for pictures with the kids. Payson wasn't too crazy about that, Bella was too bashful to get close enough for a photo, and August was too afraid, lol. I will add some pics later today...

My favorite video, Bella singing to August

2009-04-03T11:35:00.006-04:00

My Vacation...

2009-04-03T10:37:00.006-04:00

So my vacation was so great! I did a lot of planning, and came up with with a VERY ambitious list of about 20 things I wanted to do in my 4 days in Portland, OR. Half of which were shopping oriented and the other half mainly breweries and the like. I didn't get to do everything on my list, but we did some things that weren't on the list, and left some for a prospective "next time". Hopefully in the end of July, because Portland has the largest brewers festival in the states, and that would be sooooo much fun!!!

I used to think that Portland, Maine had a reasonably mediocre sized airport. That was before I went to Houston a couple of years ago. In conclusion, we have a very SMALL airport, lol. I left out of Portland, ME at about 10:30am, laid over 3 hours in Chicago. All the things they have on display at the airport is amazing! I managed the fill the 3 hours with no problems!

I arrived in Portland (west coast, baby!) at 6:30 Pacific time. From the airport my favorite cousin picked me up and we went to P.F. Chaing's for dinner. This was without a doubt the BEST Chinese cuisine I have ever eaten! They are apparently a chain, and there is one in Boston, so no doubt I will be making a point to eat there when I am in Boston again!

More to come!

Vacation time!

2009-04-02T14:20:00.003-04:00

I had an excellent vacation to the West Coast a couple of weeks ago. The man was kind enough to offer to keep the kids and let me take vacation for a few days to get away. Just so happens that my cousin relocated to Hillsboro, Oregon about 6 months ago. I was so excited for this, anticipating it every day up until I went to the airport. So I was gone from the 18th of March to the 22nd, really the 23rd, because my return flight was an overnight. More on that later, and pics! Had a GREAT time by the way...

no surprise I suppose...

2009-04-02T09:50:00.000-04:00

In case you hadn't guessed, I am still trying to work things out with the kids' dad. He is really making efforts, and creating new areas for impovement apparently. We are living together again, sort of my accident. I still have my apartment, and will for at least 6 more months. We have a lot of work to do, I have zero trust in him. Therefore I find myself snooping around his computer almost every chance I get. I have found some less than appealing and photos and emails, though they are from a time that I really expected to find these things, maybe I can share them with you;)

So far things are really going well though, the kids are happy here. Payson is on task with his school and home work, and is even happy about it! This is such a huge thing for him!!!! He is currently doing some assesment testing at school to see if they can place him into some classes at a higher grade level, and the teacher has revamped her spelling/english class to meet Payson's needs. This is so exciting! I am so happy about this, and I love this school!

I still have so many doubts about living together and wether or not we can mend the past to make a bright future, but if it can happen, it is worth the effort, it is so much better now than before, and hope we continue to make improvements. He is seeing an individual counselor, as I have been for almost 2 years now. We will also resume couples counseling this week. I will explain more how this came about later...

I'm a little psycho sometimes...

2009-04-01T23:51:00.001-04:00

just sayin'...

Masterbation

2009-04-01T09:44:00.006-04:00

Why does a man think he needs to self satisfy every single day? Reasoning eludes me. So I tell him that I will just do the same, and then we don't need to have sex, ever. We are beyond needing to procreate, therefore if we take care of our own needs, there is no need to be physical. This is only half serious you know. Seriously though, the man is only good to ejaculate once a day, and "jerks the gerkin" every morning! Kind of hard to have morning sex with 4 kids running around the house at the butt crack of dawn, so what am I to do?!?! I am sexually frustrated and deprived, maybe I just need someone on call ;) He doesn't like that idea...

For all teh funny terms on this check this out, lol...

Arrrgh, computers...

2009-03-31T21:12:00.003-04:00

So my computer has crashed, once more. I am trying desperately to upload pictures to the kids' dad's computer...without luck. The card reader is not working. Positively, We just got back home from my neighbor's little boy's birthday party. He's 5 today! Happy birthday Caleb! He is so cute! The kids had fun, ate ice cream, played with toys, made a mess, and inevitably ended up cranky when the sugar wore off. So they are all now in bed, except the oldest, who I am as we speak scolding to just "Go to bed!" Sometimes one just needs a good stiff drink to wind down and relax from the day...if only I had one now.

I'm back!

2009-02-26T13:28:00.003-05:00

After many frustrating months with a broken computer, a broken heart, and a bruised ego, here I am again! My computer is fixed, my heart is on the mend, and my spirits are high! Triumphant, I am! Today's is a short post, but I am here never the less, I will give all the juicy details later...

Payslee's first tooth!

2008-09-14T15:57:00.001-04:00

Payslee Muffen cut her first tooth on the 6th! I am so excited, and sad! She is growing so fast, just the other day she was this tiny little peanut that couldn't do anything for herself and slept all day! Now she can roll front to back and back to front, she coos and babbles and laughs and smiles, she can get up on her hands and knees already too! She started doing that last week. I bought her some GDiapers, and her little butt is so cute in them! I will have to add pictures later. Where does the time go!?!?!?

Clam digging!

2008-09-13T04:10:00.001-04:00

So we are going to go dig for some clams this week, somewhere is Scarborough. The license is $10 for a day license and you can purchase it up to 5 days in advance, assuming there is not a restriction due to red tide. I will have photos to post afterwards. More with very muddy kids!